Posted By: yourpotentialpower on
Dear Blog Buddies,
Welcome! Thanks for clicking on me, reading this and becoming a blog buddy:0)
I have to tell you right off the bat that I am from England. I am a Brit, born and bred in England so I have to apologize up front for any peculiar English sayings (Eg. Ecky thump! Cor blimey! Ta ta for now!) and even more peculiar English spellings (Eg. I had to remember to put a z in apologize just now!)
Brits on TV such as Simon Cowell from American Idol and Gordon Ramsay from Hell's Kitchen may have contributed to an image of Brits being meanies. I would like to say, for the record, I am not a meanie but I am into straight talking.
Simon Cowell and Gordon Ramsay are without doubt fierce critics who offer their personal and professional opinions with confidence and brutal straight-talking that may make you cringe, cry, laugh or all of the above.
But they are honest. They are true to themselves. Perhaps they ham it up a little for entertainment purposes (most probably!) but they say it as they see it. They are fearless of reactions to their opinions.
And because of this they remind me of our children!
I believe our children have a similar Cowell/Ramsay ability to deliver blunt, straightforward, expert opinions on all manner of things they encounter in their young lives. It is like an innate ability to speak the truth as they see it with no fear of wounding or offending anyone, just like Cowell/Ramsay. Our children's brilliant opinions should not only be sought but encouraged.
Come on now you have all had those experiences with your children where they just lay the plain truth right at your feet like a little offering of wisdom especially for you. My son appears to be particularly gifted in this department. Asked if he likes my new groovy haircut he replies, "NO. EEEUUGGHH!" Nice one. And there are pleeeeeennnnnntttttttyyyyyyy of other such examples. You know you've had those moments. You know what I am talking about!
Funnily enough, because the Cowells and the Ramsays of the world are so honest and truthful coupled with such a blunt delivery that is in no way softened, the receiver of their words of wisdom actually get to HEAR the words that are being spoken. People may not like to hear such opinions and find them unpalatable and in conflict with the image and opinion they have of themselves and their abilities. Certainly they may disregard them in the short term. But such opinions may serve a greater purpose in the long term after private reflection and some soul-searching. Such truthful opinions coming from an honest place may actually promote an opportunity for an individuals growth and personal evolution. A wake-up call. A reality check.
Perhaps as parents we might reconsider the way we offer our opinions to our children. Take a leaf out of our childrens' book. If we are constantly rewarding them with "Good job!" and "Well done!" and "Congratulations!" for every little burp, scribble, cute smile or good behavior, are we actually encouraging our children to perform life with an inner 'ta-da' added to all they do with an expectation of reward or applause? Now I don't encourage you to be deliberately hurtful to your child. For instance if they offer you a piece of art work, please don't respond with, "Well, that's just crap isn't it?" (A la Ramsay) or if they recite a nursery rhyme, please don't respond with, "Well, that's a piano bar/ karaoke/ cruise ship performance, isn't it?" (A la Cowell).
Perhaps we can be honest in our responses to our children. Let's consider our choice of words. "I can see you were really focussed on drawing this picture. I really like the colors you have chosen. Tell me about it?" Is a response that is truthful, specific and constructive in you child's development. Let's trust that our children are strong, capable, independent thinkers and confident in themselves. If we constantly 'protect' and 'cushion' them from our honest opinions as their parents are we not conveying the message that they are weak, incapable and unable to handle an honest opinion?
I invite you to share stories of your children's Cowell/ Ramsay moments. I really look forward to reading them!
Ta ta for now!
Love and light,
Laura XXXXX
Tags:
brit blog, best blog, blog, brit, gordon ramsay