Cr*ppy day
Ok, so i knew today was going to be a bad day, and for the most part i think i've done ok. Admittedly it took me until 2:30 to get out of bed and walk the dog (poor boy!!!) It wan't that i slept until then, dont think i slept all that much at all, but i just couldn't get up. I couldn't face all the things that needed doing, and i suppose in a way i couldn't really face myself. Maybe it was that more than anything else, that kept me hidden under my duvet for so long, and is making me want to go back there now.
I've also had an absolute beast of a headache all day, and i keep getting funny spots in front of my eyes. They dont stay very long, but they are so damn annoying when they are there. I know its because i am so over tired and i also know that if i stoppped being so flippin stupid and allowed myself to sleep then maybe i wouldn't feel quite as i do. But that is just not an option, despite how daft that sounds. Its making me very ill-tempered and i know i have no excuse as i am, for the most part, keeping myself awake. Its certainly no excuse for the two blazing rows i have had with my sister today. We NEVER argue. Not like this anyway. She has also been in a pretty foul mood tonight, thanks to mum throwing a giant sized spanner in the works with her university place, and so i can see why she is feeling and acting as she is and i really do feel for her. I think, to be honest, that may be where some of my anger has come from tonight, as the poor girl is distraught and i honestly dont know how to fix this. How DARE mum do this to her, after everything she gone through to get this far!! And very selfishly, why the hell should i be the one trying to pick up the pieces?
Grrrr!!!! I just want to scream and hit out at something. Watch out pillow!!...probably safest!
Oh, i so dont know what to do with myself. I do want to sleep, i really do, but i cant. I'm rambling again.....
Maybe its time to take Wooster out again...
Goodnight!
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